I've learnt to not force myself to do things against my will

As those who knows me well know, I will only use Wemo to comment on my own tagboard. As of now, I really cannot offer her my blessings and well wishes because inside me, it is just not the time yet. You can see me as petty or sour grapes but I seriously cannot do it now otherwise it will be against my will. She is still the same old hot tempered, jumpy little girl and I am still the same old childish immature (i dont know what more) person she ever knew. I am happy for her that she is finally getting what she wants. I feel that if I am the one tying the knot with the one I love, I will be very very happy till the extent that I will even want to request every blessings from any passer-by that I can see on the streets till the day we said "I do" to each other. It is such a wonderful affair and event that it does not warrant getting angry or saying hurtful words. I am confident that my wife will be much more suited to me as compared to her but everytime when I think back, it is so hard because she really set quite a high benchmark despite us quarreling at least on an average of once a month from JC till Uni. I am a person who looks forward instead of reminising the past, I am a person who only remembers good things and happy events instead of hatred and sadness. But I am a person who is easily affected by current happenings which in turned made me very emo. But at least, I am not emo over this issue and I have not been emo for a long long while, maybe recently I am too bored so it might have tranlate into me being emo. I still like watching romantic show and see how the male and female leads overcome all problems before they are finally together. If a love cannot withstand all the storms and overcome all the obstacles ahead of them, it is not strong and worthy, but instead it is a blind state of hot romance.

I hope that one day I can look into her eyes and tell her I wish that she will have a wonderful marriage. However, although I might not be able to do it now, it doesn't mean I still cannot when I wake up the next day. I have to wait for the sign.