Going to revamp my room

I have to keep myself busy to prevent myself from thinking about things that cannot solved. I wish that I can get amnesia and forget about that whole issue because sometimes it really hurts at the most painful spot. Easier said than done, I can't ignore her, I can't talk to her, I can't seem to do anything. She is just like the weather in December. You can never guess when you will regret that you decide against bringing that umbrella out. My new tutee is called xinyi, I already have a cousin who is called xinyi, Xinyi Xinyi kept appearing in my life. My elective GV17 also have this song called Isabel which we have to practise and sing. Is this fate? Please stop playing tricks on me. Life is not only about her, people have been telling me, people like lum kor (I hope your leg is fine lum ye) had been through it before. Maybe I am feeling this way because things are dragging dunno till when. It's horrendous. It is really hard. I am at loss what to do. Can someone help me?